Many of those from New England, New York, and Baltimore Yearly Meetings had never visited Quaker Hill before, nor attended an FUM event where pastors and superintendents (or general secretaries) from Indiana, Iowa, Wilmington, and Western Yearly Meetings were present. The plenary discussions began with our attempts to grapple with the two "types" of Quakers - the activists and the contemplatives - and quickly moved to the painful place of challenging each other's understanding of and commitment to Quakerism and Christianity. There was pain and shock as Eastern Friends learned of the differences among us and of how widespread the adoption of a "just war" theology is across the Society of Friends.

The structure of the consultation contained us. Carolyn Keys reported on her work in Burundi with Friends Peace Teams and spoke of how important it was for her to be rooted in Montclair Monthly Meeting, All Friends Regional Meeting, and New York Yearly Meeting and how these communities provided her with both spiritual and practical support. Bridget Moix spoke of the Peace Testimony as a testimony of hope, and the core of this hope in individual and communal worship. I brought hard copies of almost every Worship and Action Update and directed Friends to www.nyym.org. Rosa presented each attender a copy of the Peace Concerns Committee's notebook of Resources on Conscientious Objection. There were small group discussions and workshops. There were hymns and Scripture readings. There was "open" silent worship.

As some poured out high emotions and others withdrew into pained and stony silence, the Holy Spirit moved among us. By Sunday morning, we found ourselves blessed to agree that we wanted to continue working at community-building among ourselves as Quakers, and among Quakers as peacemakers. There were calls to investigate the possibilities of:

• A renewal of intervisitation and traveling ministry;
• Networking to create resources for support and for skills in peacemaking;
• Identifying common works we already share, such as conscientious objection, war taxes witness, nonviolence training;
• Reconstituting - with constituent yearly meetings' participation - the Friends Coordinating Committee for Peace;
• Reconvening in a year.

Finally, here are some quotes that are living with me a week later:

• "The hardest places are where you have to be in order to see where you're going."
• "We have been taken back to square one. God does that so we can start over in a new direction."
• "In Indiana Yearly Meeting there is about 10 percent support for the peace testimony. Many pastors are rebuked by their monthly meetings for speaking against the war."
• "In Iowa Yearly Meeting, many monthly meetings, even families, are split between Quaker pacifism and brothers and fathers in the National Guard."
• "In Southwest Ohio, pictures of Quakers serving in Iraq are pinned on the monthly meetings' bulletin boards and decorated with yellow ribbons."
• "The most important work for peace we can do is to invite people into a listening relationship with God."

--Carol Holmes (Fifteenth Street Meeting)

He spoke of a week living with an Arab family, of coming to feel part of that family and promising to return, but still not being able to bring himself to tell them that he was Jewish. He also spoke of his joyous experience, after telling the family of his Jewish background via e-mail upon returning home, of receiving a "love letter" from them full of appreciation, photos, and connections.

He reported going to a smoke-filled shack in the midst of a rubble-strewn lot to meet some of the friends of his host. With little grasp of each other's language, they struggled to talk about bringing peace to their land. Somehow they were able to communicate. He reflected that most people - virtually everyone with whom he spoke - wanted peace and that polls indicate 78% of Israelis and of Palestinians would be willing to live in a united country with one united government.

Stan described challenging FUM, AFSC, and other concerned persons - before, during, and after the trip - about what we/they/Friends are and are not doing in the Middle East. FUM and AFSC have presences in the Arab lands but no program in Israel. Bringing Arabs and Israelis together - peacemaking - is not part of their programs. Stan offers the discernment that neither Arab nor Jew is blameless, that neither is justified in the evil it or its people are doing, and that this is a profoundly unsettling insight for many Friends and good people concerned with peace in the Middle East.

Stan refers to himself as "naive," as asking obvious questions of situations. But I see the sincerity of his quest and heard in his talk the evolution of a leading. I could feel Stan's strong leading to bring together many people to bring peace to the Middle East. He may not yet have appreciated the scale of his goals, but I believe that - with the help of the spirit and many F/friends - he could do it! It amazes me to put those words on paper. Stan is strong in what he wants to learn and to accomplish. I was humbled.

Anne Wright (Scarsdale Meeting)

His presentation incorporated the ambivalence of a pacifist Quaker born in Jerusalem of Russian-Jewish parents, who survived adolescence on the rough streets of New York City by fighting so well that he became a Golden Gloves boxer. While he saw and felt the daily pain and humiliation faced by Palestinians, he saw also the pain and constant fear of Israelis. Stan carried us into his experience, moving many to commit to act for healing in this corner of the Middle East.

Sue Weisfeld (Scarsdale Meeting)

Stan also challenged us to consider A. J. Muste's words that "We will not have peace until we learn to love Hitler." During reconciliation, we must often deal with people we have demonized. Feelings of hatred or repulsion must be set aside to achieve progress.

Both of these statements suggest that we, as agents of constructive change in the world, must strive for emotional maturity and self-control. We must honor our feelings (and our biases) by recognizing them, and yet not succumb to their destructive influences during the arduous and complex task of peacemaking. I have been thinking deeply about this. I am sure he is correct.

Jeff Menoher (Wilton Meeting)

A Quiet Friend

Judy Inskeep (Purchase Meeting)

Possible action and follow-up: It may seem presumptuous of us to think we could make a difference, but fresh and unfettered peacemakers may sometimes prove to be welcome healers. Stan pointed out that our naivete should not be an excuse for inaction nor necessarily a barrier to effectiveness. I do think Friends in New York Yearly Meeting and our AFSC New York Metropolitan Region should consider taking a lead. This could include: (1) dialogues within our region - just as the AFSC carried out dialogues in the New York Metropolitan Region among Haitians, among Sri Lankans, and between Croatians and Serbs, perhaps we need to consider dialogues here between Jews and Arabs that could lead to further action; (2) establishing and expanding interfaith villages in Israel and the West Bank. The village in Israel of Neve Shalom/Wahat al-Salam serves as an example that Stan's vision is attainable. For more than twenty years, Jewish and Palestinian citizens of Israel have lived and worked together as equals in this community. See www.oasisofpeace.org. It's good to do workshops, but let's work to establish permanent villages of peace in Israel and on the West Bank, villages that embody peace every day of the year.

Hank Elkins (Scarsdale Meeting)